Dating Den Episode 4 – With Marni Kinrys: Understanding Men: What They Really Desire
Wouldn’t it be great if there was a dating app that let you magically see what was going on inside of men’s brains…
Or a Speak & Translate app that converts ‘manspeak’ into words women understand?
Then you could be sure about things like…
Why a guy you had a great date with never asked you for a second date…
Or why a man you thought you might have a future with just disappeared…
If you are like millions of other women that struggle to understand men ….
You need to listen to this AWESOME podcast with my guest Marni Kinrys. Marni K. has spent the last 10-years helping men (and now women) meet and attract and understand each other through her top rated blog Wing Girl Method.
Men can be so confusing. They always seem to want what we can’t have.
You want to understand men a little bit better?
You feel like guys keep giving you all the right signals then the other shoe drops…. and they disappear?
Do you want to know the secret to make him STAY interested in you?
Here’s what you’ll discover in this episode…
What are Men Thinking When — It Comes to Dating? [4:12]
Men want to be able to bring quality women into their lives. They do want to be in a relationship. Time and time again men say they want a good girl, who respects them, who they don’t have to chase over and over, who they don’t have to convince to be with them and a woman who doesn’t put them in the ‘friend zone’ for months at a time.
95% of the time men are not thinking like women are thinking.
Men haven’t had much information available to them about dating and how to find a quality woman. And, the materials that were available to them were pickup artist stuff and objectifying women articles. Women have had relationship based magazines, books and programs for much longer.
What Keeps A Quality Guy Up at Night? [7:51]
Men have fears of rejection or that they will build up an attraction and then lose it by saying something stupid. They are afraid to make an approach unless they believe it will be a sure thing. Men are not as confident as they once were.
Help A Brother Out [13:34]
It’s important for women to remember that men have a filter which is based from their past experiences with women. Women should know subtle communication does not come across to men. They must be more overt than they are with other females. Touching a man’s arm or smiling and engaging in conversation with him give him subtle hints and normally won’t be construed as aggressive.
Often, men are so confused about what women want or what is acceptable right now they become frozen by the confusion. They become edited, polite, meek versions of themselves.
Just Tell Me How to Make You Happy [16:08]
Men are good at following direct paths. If a woman tells a man what they want and not just expect him to do it a man will know exactly what path to follow. They can feel wonderful about themselves because they are making their woman happy. And, the next time they can do it again on their own.
If you want to see a man on a regular basis you can tell him it makes you happy and that you would love to see him.
A man needs clear communication from a woman.
So, Why Do Guys Disappear? [27:17]
Both men and women have disappearing acts. When a man disappears it’s a clear indication of what he thinks about you. It means they are not invested in the relationship.
Are Men Intimidated By Strong Women? [30:54]
A man’s masculinity is very closely associated with how much money he makes, how much power he has and what kind of women are in his life. Financial stability is attached to a man’s ego and what their definition of being a man is.
Questions to Ask a Guy on a First Date [35:37]
If a woman wants know if the guy she is meeting is a quality guy there are ways to find out on the first date. Marni says to talk about your own experiences to see how a man responds.
Women should think about what they are looking for before going on a date.
A man is likely to be nervous on a first date with a woman. Men can get flustered too. If you want to help make a man feel more comfortable you can subtly let them know they are winning. A woman can say “I’m having a great time” to help a man through a date. This way he doesn’t have to do all the work.
Men are wonderful and if they have clear direction they can be anything we want them to be.