Life Check Yourself Episode 312 – With Tess Brigham: Why Knowing Your Issues May Not Be Enough to Get Better Results
Marni welcomes the woman CNBC calls the Millennial Therapist, Tess Brigham to the Life Check Yourself studio. Tess is an expert Psychotherapist, Life Coach, and Public Speaker. For over 10-years, Tess has specialized in helping 20-somethings discover their unique life path so they can make an impact.
Key Takeaways from this Episode:
- Reduce anxiety and overwhelm for young adults
- How Millennials and Gen Zers can carve their path to happiness
- What parents shouldn’t tell their young adult children
- Dating via social media and apps
How Recent Events Have Changed Young People [2:38]
Millennials find themselves in a different space. Many graduated college during the 2008-2009 recession and found themselves unable to afford a house when home prices righted themselves. They are in a tough predicament and some say they have given up trying to get ahead financially.
Gen Zers found themselves coming of age during the pandemic and missing some important milestones in life because the entire world closed down.
Tess believes that it is harder to be a young person today. With the hardest part being the overwhelm they feel. Many feel they must figure everything out and get it right, right now. They believe there is no time to waste when making life decisions. Much of this right here-right now thinking comes from the fast pace of technology, Tess says.
What can they do to get unstuck? — Tess asserts it starts with stopping for a second and taking a look at their life in the current moment. When they assess where they are and ask themselves what is working for them and what is not, it can help them to stop what they are doing and change directions.
Pick an area of life that is not working for you and explore what happens when you try something different. Chat with new people, and push the edges of your comfort zone.
Parents of Young Adults Can Reduce the Anxiety [13:20]
Parents can help their young adult children by letting them know it is okay to let go of the myths of time frames of what they assume they should be doing. Reassure them it is their life to do with what they will. And, there is no better time to start doing things that make them happy.
Young adults can relieve anxiety and overwhelm by:
- Taking a break from social media.
- Doing a life assessment.
- Looking at life as an exploration.
- Consider what they need more of to be happy.
Parents avoid asking your adult kids these questions:
- Why are you still single?
- Can you really afford xxx?
Many parents get stuck in the headspace that they are responsible for solving their kids’ problems. Teach your children to solve their own problems, let them work out the things they are considering, and don’t pressure them to make concrete decisions right now.
If you want to have a different relationship with your child, stop offering your two cents until they ask for it. Cultivate the relationship that makes them want to call you and talk about their lives.
Do Gen Zers’ Hook Up First & Date Later? [24:48]
Social media and dating apps are changing the dating game for young adults. No one uses the phone anymore. Many rely solely on texting to get to know another person, even when many are longing for deep, long-lasting relationships.
Tess says people are not meeting in real life as much as they should be. They use apps so much for relationships, they don’t look up to consider people in the real world. Tess thinks millennials and Gen Zers’ are much more separated. Even though all of the interaction prepares them for relationships in life.