Dating Den Episode 23 – With Daniel Packard: Why Goal Oriented Women Fail When It Comes to Dating
Let me ask you an important question…
It may actually be the important question…
What do you think the single most important thing you have to learn before you can find love, before you can be happy… before your life can be truly fulfilled?
It’s the number 1 thing all experts agree on…
And when you get it… or have it… or understand it
The pieces of your life start to fall together, as if by magic.
I’m sure by now you know I’m talking about self love.
My guest today, Daniel, is very handsome, very smart and passionate about self love.
Girls like it when we get a hit of cognitive joojoo to go along with our woowoo.
Daniel created a precise and clear model of the mechanics of self love after years of experiential and academic research. He knows exactly how to build self love on a daily basis and he is going to share it with all of us.
The Difference Between Self Esteem and Self Love? [3:04]
Self esteem is an external attribute while self love is an internal attribute. Self love is more about what kind of a friend you are to yourself? Self love is the nitty gritty way you care for yourself every day. Daniel says the blindspot of the self love movement is when people accidentally not loving ourselves while telling ourselves how much we love. Women are in a linear, masculine, goal-oriented energy when they try to force themselves into self love. It’s wiser to use a feminine energy to heal and nurture themselves.
Women Need to Nourish Themselves [9:44]
The reason women lose track of their inner wisdom and their divinity is fear. Daniel says fear makes everybody stupid. When people are afraid they are addicted to comfort and thus avoiding what they fear. They may get trapped in a world of lack of fulfillment. The world we live in is a physical, masculine world. Women need courage in order to reconnect with their divine gifts. Self love is extra important for women.
How Can I Get More Self Love? [15:37]
People have self love backward. If you think you need more self love you are automatically telling yourself you are lacking. If you want to see pure self love look at children. Kids are the most loving, in the moment, present beings on the planet. They share their essence and don’t give a crap what you think. They are self love. So, maybe we had self love and it’s gone missing.
The Self Created Vicious Cycle [21:37]
We do have love for ourselves inside but it may be asleep. The original lie that has robbed us of that child-like love is the belief of we are not enough to be loved. We tell ourselves we are broken and can not be loved. So, we go to the outside world to find love and validation. When the outside world doesn’t love us enough we feel rejected. We then fear rejection and once we are afraid we can not be fully self-expressed and open. It’s exhausting.
Breaking Through [28:17]
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“What kind of friend are you to yourself?”
“Self love is about effortless power versus power that takes a lot of effort.”
“A lie can only exist if you keep telling it to yourself.”