Dating Den Episode 205 – With Dr. Richard Davidson — How to Create Connection and Attract a Better Partner in Two Minutes a Day
Marni welcomes renowned Researcher and published Author, Dr. Richard Davidson into the Den to discuss how to increase connectedness and wellbeing during the COVID pandemic and beyond. Dr. Davidson offers daily practices to help transform our emotions and alter our ability to give and receive love and compassion.
Key takeaways from this episode:
- How to access and connect to emotions
- Overcoming loneliness during the pandemic
- Increase your self-compassion
- Tips for bringing more love into the world
Insights From His Holiness [1:50]
For years, Dr. Davidson studied the adverse effects of stress and depression. He was interested in how to nudge people toward resilience, vulnerability, and other positive qualities but there was no baseline for the scientific research. His Holiness, The Dalai Lama called him out and asked him why he didn’t use his tools to study compassion. It was a wake-up call for Dr. Davidson. He began studying the positive side of the equation.
His Holiness had the orientation of figuring out what was right with people, not what is wrong with them.
It is difficult to conduct serious scientific research on emotions because they are complex human qualities.
Consulting Our Emotions Through the Four Pillars of Wellbeing [5:56]
The brain plays an important role in our emotions. If the brain has been damaged in some way it can impair emotions. It can have debilitating consequences in many areas of our lives. In dating, the decision to partner with someone is a huge decision. It is not a decision that is made only by calculation, it is made by consulting our emotions.
Four Key Pillars of Wellbeing
- Awareness — Important for the development of personal transformation.
- Connection — The qualities important for healthy social relationships.
- Insight — Self-knowledge.
- Purpose — Aligning behavior with a sense of purpose.
Research shows when we cultivate healthy habits it changes our brain in ways that allow wellbeing to endure.
If we spent as much time nurturing the positive qualities of our mind, as we do brushing our teeth, this world would be a different place.
Bringing Love Into Our Physically-Distanced World [28:11]
We can transform our brains, they are not static. Every day our brains are changing based on the input it is receiving. When we have practices that focus on compassion and kindness we can alter and increase our wellbeing.
Dr. Davidson says we are in the midst of an epic struggle between the forces of fear and the forces of love. He believes love will win because love is at the core of who we are as human beings. We are socially connected creatures, and at the core of social connection is love.
We can socially connect to others during this pandemic and continue to follow the safety guidelines. Taking precautions by physically distancing and wearing masks is contributing to the greater good.
We have an opportunity to reclaim our true nature of love, kindness, and compassion.
