Dating Den Episode 204 – Bachelorette Recap: With Chris Gillis — How to Really Know if the Guy You Are Dating is the One
On this week’s Bachelorette recap, Marni and Chris discuss Bennett’s triumphant return, Noah’s spry cleverness, Zach and Ben’s emotional struggles, and Tayshia’s confusing behavior when it comes to choosing a partner. While Tayshia seems to be doing a great job of extracting a guys’ true nature she appears to be leaning toward the guys most in need of repair.
Key takeaways from this episode:
- How to apologize with heart
- Why no one likes to date a crybaby
- How to date someone who is smarter than you
- It is perfectly OK to date more than one person at the same time
- Why being critical is a relationship killer
Don’t Call it a Comeback [1:42]
Remember Bennett, the Harvard guy who is really sensible and smart but comes off a bit condescending when he tries to be vulnerable? Well, he is back to woo Tayshia. After his tumultuous departure, he comes back to apologize to Tayisha for judging her. Chris says he missed the big opportunity to explain the entire situation but it was a kind gesture. The question is does Bennett want to win or is he falling in love? The guy at the center of the controversy, Noah, is very clever and has more emotional intelligence than Bennett. But, Noah lies.
Another Tayshia favorite, Ben. has Marni a tad worried. Ben reveals he has tried to kill himself a couple of times in the last few years. He is being vulnerable but Marni questions his ability to be a long-term, reliable partner. His perfectionism may cause him to focus on what is wrong in life instead of what is right.
Ivan seems to be the most stable and emotionally available of all the guys.
Both Zach and Ben have struggled with demons in their past. Marni advises ‘if a guy is working on something be sure to give the relationship some time to see how it pans out. Don’t rule someone out because they are dealing with a hardship”.
Not Every Woman Can Deal with a Super Smart Guy [29:31]
The Noah/Bennett clash gets heated when Noah points out that Bennett may be talking down to Tayshia. Chris asks Marni about dating someone who is superior in some aspects. Bennett is smart but instead of coming off as superior, most of the guys like him.
Some women love to date super smart guys while others are intimidated by them. Self-confidence is a factor.
Marni recalls the Gottman Institute’s Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse relationship red flags. One is being critical of your partner. It makes it hard to have a successful long-term relationship. If you get into a major tiff with a partner, engage in apologies, seek mutual understanding, then explore how you can improve interactions in the future.
Are you critical of the people you date?
Is it OK to Date More Than One Person at a Time? [29:31]
Chris reveals his thoughts about when men date more than one person and how it differs from when women do it. He says “men are notorious for not having a disconnect about what goes on below the belt but women get attached.” He asks Marni’s opinion about women having several physical relationships at once.
Marni is all about dating multiple people at once. She says that women don’t need to tell guys they are dating other people. She adds “as long as you have your dignity, you can do what you want”.
Ladies, date at least two guys at a time so you don’t feel like all your eggs are in one basket.
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