Life Check Yourself Episode 359 – With Glenn Sandifer — A Revolutionary Approach for Today’s Modern Woman: How to Define Your Type so You Can Be Picky in a Good Way
Glenn Sandifer joins Marni in the Life Check Yourself studio to help successful women find a man that matches their drive, ambition, and expectations. Glenn has over 20 years of experience in field sales and marketing. He says success in the workplace is often at odds with intimate relationships. He understands how busy people can enjoy their work but fail to build or maintain healthy personal connections outside of office hours. They discuss his book, Middle Ground: How to Get Great Dating Outcomes in a Modern World.
Takeaways from this episode:
- How to define your type
- Relationship expectations of high-quality, successful women
- How to find a HENRY (high-earner not rich yet)
- How to identify seasons in a relationship
- Is it time to take the lead or be the helper?
Empowered at Work, Disempowered in Relationship [1:50]
Many women express their concerns about dating in the workplace. The challenge these high achievers have is they get tangled up in relationships that don’t meet their expectations.
Successful women often find themselves lingering with F-boys or the modern man. Modern women usually get with modern men but most modern women don’t want a modern man, they want a traditional man. Modern women are uncertain about what they want in a relationship. They believe they want a relationship to be 50-50, yet they have certain expectations about what role the man should play. And, traditional men generally don’t look for modern successful women.
High-value men are HENRYs: High-Earners Not Rich Yet.
In his book, Glenn defines a male persona as someone who takes care of a successful woman but doesn’t have any drive of his own. A successful woman will wait around for the male to step up but it simply wastes her time. The spirit of sacrifice and the spirit of duty necessary for a sustainable relationship are things most 25-year-old guys don’t have.
Finding Common Ground [16:33]
Glenn notes that some of the best relationship outcomes occur when there is a Leader and a Helper in all aspects of a relationship. At times, a woman leads and other times she helps, and vice-versa. Marni shares an example of clients who have difficulty shifting old paradigms of the leader/helper roles. Clients may say things like, “He is supposed to take this role.” Often, women have expectations that men should always take the lead.
Glenn’s personal view is that a lot can be learned from the Bible. He says there is a set of beliefs in the Bible, to guide us toward relationship success.
To be in a long-term, sustainable, committed relationship, we have a long view. There are seasons we go through but everything shifts and changes with time.
We all need to be intentional about our communication. Generally, when there is trouble in a relationship, we find that communication has been inauthentic and unclear.
Many times women want men to lead the conversation about where things stand in a relationship.
