When we find someone we really like, it’s easy to interpret the supposed signals our guy is sending in order to mold the connection into what hope it is. Unfortunately, as disheartening as it may be to hear, guys’ signals can be pretty universally easy to interpret…as long as you know what to look for.
If you’re ready to take an honest look at what your guy is really trying to say, here’s a Dating with Dignity no-excuses guide to finding the right signals to pay attention to.
Signals can easily be misinterpreted if you’ve gotten physical too soon. Sure, he may be making all kinds of plans and stroking your ego to high heaven. But does he just so happen to utter these things when you’re in a state of mid-undress or starting to express even the slightest bit of doubt over whether or not your rendezvous should continue?
Guys will be the first to tell you they don’t think with their brain (I’ll let you infer the rest.). So even if he doesn’t mean any harm, he may be saying all the right things for all the wrong reasons.
Actions Speak Louder Than Words
One surefire way to tell if a guy means what he says is if he follows through on those promises. If he can’t wait to take you out to dinner and is dying to spoil you the way you deserve, he would’ve made a reservation already.
His reasons for making empty promises could be as simple as wanting to get into your pants (see above), or perhaps there are more complex self-esteem issues at work here. Regardless of the reason, you should be setting your sights on someone who makes each moment with you memorable rather than always speaking in the future tense.
Mixed Signals Are a Myth
Ultimately, the fact you’re even fretting over a series of mixed signals means you’ve got your answer. Rather than blaming it on yourself or something you did, remember that a guy who regularly flakes or doesn’t make it obvious how he feels about you is not a real man, and he’s certainly not one you should be dating.
It can take years of dating experience and a willpower of steel to get to where you can identify and deftly cut ties early on. But training yourself to be wary when signals start to seem mixed is a healthy step in the right direction.