Life Check Yourself Episode 314 – Top Dating Mistakes You are Making Online with Chris Gillis
Marni and Chris Gillis are back analyzing another reality dating show. This season’s Love is Blind is on the discussion block in this episode. The Love is Blind experiment attempts to discover if we are able to love somebody without meeting them face-to-face?
Key Takeaways from this Episode
- Discovering your core values
- Tacky online dating questions
- Beauty is subjective
- Don’t get emotionally invested too soon in the dating process
- Date more than one person until you have ‘the’ conversation
Discovering Dealbreakers & Non-Negotiables [2:42]
Chris sets up the premise for Love is Blind. The fascinating element of the show is that people are in pods and only have the opportunity to listen to each other. They ask questions to build an avatar about who the other people are. Questions get deep swiftly, avoiding normal surface-level interactions.
Contestants seem to narrow down their five core values quickly proving that initial physical attraction isn’t necessary. They end up realizing what they thought was important isn’t and unexpected things become insanely attractive. Beauty is subjective.
The contestants on Love is Blind get clear about what they are looking for in a partner.
Tacky Online Dating Questions [7:29]
One girl, Tricia, seems hell-bent on letting everyone know how hot she is and she touts a large Instagram following. It is a great example of someone who looks good on paper but seems too concerned about her data. When she talks about it, it is unattractive and masculine. Marni says, like many women that go through her program, she probably has no idea how it comes across when dating.
Then there is Shane, who keeps asking Shaina what she is wearing. It is gross and unattractive. Shane oversexualizes most things when talking with someone. Sexuality doesn’t play well in this environment.
Expectations in Early Dating [23:19]
By the end of the first episode, Shayne, Natalie, and Shaina are in a Love is Blind triangle. Marni extracts real-life dating lessons from the trifecta.
An important point to remember is that when we are at the beginning stages of dating no one owes anyone anything. A common mistake women make is getting overly optimistic instead of cautiously optimistic at the beginning of the dating process. If you like someone it isn’t pleasant to think that they might be dating someone else. People don’t want to have ‘the’ conversation yet end up being blindsided when the other person breaks things off to be with another person.
Be honest about where you are in dating and have a conversation if you are unsure where the relationship stands.