Life Check Yourself Episode 292 – Masculine Energy and the Valentine's Day Gift Dilemma Solved: With Chris Gillis
Marni and Chris Gillis work tirelessly to extract every morsel of dating advice from the beginning of season 26 of The Bachelor. Sweet, former NFLer and alpha-male Clayton Echard was given a cool $100k to have 31 women test his dating mettle and claim their hearts. Let’s see who stood out and who went home.
Key Takeaways from this Episode:
- Rules on Valentine’s Day gift giving
- Dropping into you feminine energy
- Are you ready for a serious relationship?
- What to do if a guy keeps mentioning his ex
Salley Makes a Quick Exit [4:28]
Salley, the blonde with the Love Island hair extensions, showed up for the opening show. But she did so only to tell Clayton she was supposed to get married the same weekend. Her quick exit came after telling Clayton she just wanted to meet him but she hadn’t yet fully recovered from her breakup with her ex-fiance.
It begs the question, how do you know when you should start dating again after a breakup?
If you are still pining for your ex, you are not ready to be in a serious relationship.
If you continue to be triggered by songs, memories, or anything else you and your ex did together, you are not ready.
On the flip side, if you are on a date and a guy starts talking about his ex. Give him time to express himself and be curious. If he continues to do it on multiple dates, play the empathy card. If he realizes what he has been doing and stops all is well. If he doesn’t stop, he is not ready to be dating yet. Tell him you are not a therapist and move on.
Marni and Chris think Clayton may be insecure and he likely will fall for anyone who likes him. He kissed five women on the first night. They also think Salley will make a comeback later in the season.
Exuding Masculine Energy [15:17]
Marni notes that there are a lot of successful, professional women competing this season. It will be interesting to see if they are able to drop into their feminine energy during the dating process.
Claire Heilig is an example of a woman who wasn’t able to get there. She and Clayton go on a fake tailgating-esque date. She couldn’t disguise her male vibe when they played cornhole. When Clayton got flirty about almost winning, Claire’s testosterone shot up and she reminded him sternly that she, in fact, won the match.
A guy doesn’t want to kiss a dude in a dress. Are you being too competitive? Do you need to win?
Chris says, she revealed more about how she feels about herself and her need to win.
Too Much Too Soon, Gift Giving [26:13]
Showing up with flowers on a first date is a tradition for some people, but showing up with a 100-year-old family photo is a bit much. Elizabeth offers the only copy of a family keepsake photo to Clayton right out of the gate.
Marni points out that women tend to overgive. As a general rule, don’t bring a gift to your first date.
For Valentine’s Day, if a guy you are dating hasn’t asked you out by Feb. 7th, you can ask what is going on. Or, tell him how much you love celebrating the date. It doesn’t have to be awkward. Just have an open-ended conversation. It isn’t always easy to put yourself out there. Vulnerability is necessary for communication.
A gift doesn’t have to be tangible. It can be a simple compliment.