Dating Den Episode 41 – With Kat: How To Stop The Off And On Again Cycle For Good (Even If It’s Been Going On For Years)! There are many women who can identify with Kat’s problem in her on again, off0again, #dysfunctionalAF relationship.
If you have ever been strung along by a guy you love, who you know is so WRONG for you, it is really important you listen to this episode.
Kat’s On Again Off Again Guy [1:36]
Kat is in an on/off relationship. She doesn’t know who he sees when they are “off”. She says she wants to move on but she is in love with the guy. She just wants to be in a fun relationship with someone who cares about her.
Her guy picks a fight when he wants to go away and then sends a text a few days later. He says he’s done but never allows Kat to move on.
He knows she’ll keep coming back no matter what crap he pulls.
Why Kat Gives Up Her Power and Dignity [7:17]
Kat is in a romantic rut. She is giving up all her power and dignity and allowing the guy to push her in one direction and then pull her into another. But, why is she allowing herself to be treated this way?
She feels sad, broken and that she has wasted years on him.
Getting Over A Romantic Rut
A Romantic Rut is a negative pattern – like a vicious cycle – you engage in over and over again that always has the same negative result.
- Write it out. At each choice point, as yourself
- What do I think?
- What do I feel?
- What do I do?
- Recognize your Choice Points and make new decisions to get what you want.
- Don’t react, respond.
Kat doesn’t realize how much power she has!
Kat’s Vision for a Romantic Future [22:23]
It’s extremely important for Kat to get out of this Romantic Rut and find a partner who wants to be in a loving and committed relationship. She wants someone she can count on to have her back.
Everytime Kat does something not in alignment with this vision she is actively moving away from what she wants.