Life Check Yourself Episode 290 – Can I Get Him to Commit? With Dr. Emily Owens & Chris Gillis
Marni, Chris Gillis, and newcomer clinical psychologist, Dr. Emily Owens attempt to make heads or tails of the season finale of The Bachelorette 2021. It seems All-American girl Michelle Young has a bad picker. She chose Nayte who struggles with communications over emotionally well-versed Brandon. She may need to Life Check herself.
Key takeaways from this episode:
- Make your words and actions match
- Play the long game when it comes to finding connection
- What you see is what you get with men
- Stay committed to your deal breakers
Your Words Don’t Match Your Actions Michelle [1:43]
Michelle can’t go back and have a do-over. She chose Nayte, a guy who has never been in a relationship in his life and doesn’t talk about his feelings. But, Marni says, this happens in real life to intelligent, savvy, professional women every day.
Dr. Emily notes that Michelle’s body language told the story. She obviously has more of an attraction to Nayte. But, this isn’t in line with what Michelle said about needing to find someone who loves her more than she loves him. She is probably setting herself up to fail.
Brandon and Michelle’s hug looked tender, soft, and authentic. The Nayte and Michelle hug didn’t give off the same energy.
After the rose ceremony, the network tells Nayte he has to move to Minnesota and the couple will receive $200,000 to buy a house. Does the money come with stipulations?
Dr. Emily says Michelle may be trying to fit Nayte into a mold that he has professed isn’t for him. What you see is what you get with men. The relationship may not last very long.
Brandon the Break Up King [14:24]
Brandon exhibited an emotionally mature communication style when Michelle broke up with him. He truly knows how to communicate his feelings. He said he wanted Michelle to be happy even if it wasn’t with him. He had a spiritual point of view. Marni hopes he stays true to being a nice, sweet kid. Chris agreed, saying that for a guy he articulated exceptional wisdom.
Even the Twitterverse is poking fun at the discrepancy in Nayte’s inability to express himself and Brandon’s communication skills.
Ladies, when you are dating, be committed to your deal breakers and make sure you are looking for the right things.
Emily says the thing about values is that they are a long-term game. In dating, if you play the short-term game you set yourself up to fail. Over the long term, you will feel more connected if you stay true to your values.
What is your game plan and how can you date to win?
Marni thinks Michele may not be emotionally available enough to receive the kind of love Brandon has to offer.
Bachelor 2021 & 2022 [35:43]
The barriers to the contestants finding healthy, romantic love for Bachelor 2021 were:
- Sabotaging perfectly good possibilities.
- Wishing, hoping, or believing the right person will show up instead of doing the work
- Recognizing the short game versus long game contenders.
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