Dating With Dignity

“Why am I still single?”

This question plagues just about every woman who comes to Dating With Dignity for coaching. Invariably, before coming to me for help, she has asked this same question of her girlfriends, her mother, her best male friend, and even her therapist. More often than not, when a woman comes to me for coaching, she has enjoyed success in so many other areas of her life, but has been unsuccessful at finding and/or keeping a loving relationship; and she is, to put it simply, mystified.

“It doesn’t make sense,” she declares. “Why?” she asks again. “Why am I STILL single?”

If you are asking yourself—and your friends, family, and mental health professionals—this question, I can help. The first step is examining the often contradictory and self-defeating beliefs that lie deep in your heart—beliefs you may not have admitted to yourself, let alone anyone else. These beliefs are likely the biggest obstacles standing between you and the relationship you desire. Once you’ve uncovered these beliefs, you’ll be ready to shed the “It doesn’t make sense” mantra and get on with making the changes necessary to find
the relationship of your dreams.

So, Why Are You Still Single?

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If you’re going to be in the L.A. area on Monday, September 12 at 7pm, click here to register for our live event: How to Master Feminine Communication and Get What You Need Without Being a Bitch, Shedding a Tear, or Slamming the Door!

While some men just aren’t Mr. Boyfriend Material, others just need clear communication from you about what you want, need, and expect from them. To make things trickier, many women have difficulty articulating exactly what they are looking for. That said, imagine if you knew the following:

• Exactly what you want in a partner—including his values and goals in life.
• How to effectively communicate your needs and expectations without having to be bitchy, brash or judgmental.
• Simple ways to set boundaries to allow the possibility of a relationship to unfold, before you knee-jerk kick him to the curb.

In order to get your needs met you have to be able to articulate exactly what you need, and then be able to communicate those needs in a way that is appropriate, kind, compassionate, and reveals your true, authentic self.

Here are three steps you can take right now to begin to clearly express your desires to the man in your life so that you can begin getting what you want:

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Time and time again, the men I interview and work with tell me that the number one thing they are attracted to (outside of physical attraction, which varies widely from man to man) is…drumroll please… CONFIDENCE!

Confidence is such a subjective word. What does confidence look like? What does it feel like? What is missing when you don’t feel confident? In order to create confidence you uncovering who you are at your very core. Beneath all the masks you wear in hopes of fitting in, being loved, getting approval, or coping with the ups and downs of life as an adult woman in the twenty-first
century, there is a version of you that is real and is free from the dark voice of your “inner critic.” In order to discover the you that lives beneath the masks—the real you—it is important to look at the roles in your life in which you shine the brightest.

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