FOMO, or the fear of missing out, is a common malady these days as everyone from moms to your old high school classmates post the most flattering snapshots of their lives to Facebook or Instagram, causing everyone else to undervalue the lives they’re leading. Unfortunately, this chronic misconception has spread to the world of dating and has caused men and women alike to always keep one eye out for someone hotter, smarter, or skinnier than the person they’re already with.
Commitment issues have been common for decades. But when you add FOMO to the mix, more daters than ever are seeking to quench a never-ending thirst for this impossibly perfect person they deserve. And unfortunately, this is happening at the expense of perfectly compatible mates worthy of commitment. To bring all you daters back down to earth, here’s how to tell if FOMO is distracting you from what love is really about and what you can do to take a more realistic approach to dating.
Evaluate Your Tendency to Regret
Take an honest look at how your past relationships ended. Do you find that you never seem to be truly happy with what you’ve got? Are you always the one to end things in search of something better? Do you find once you’ve moved onto the next best thing that what you had before was pretty great? These are all telltale signs of a FOMO dater.
Luckily, the first step to solving this problem is recognizing you have it. Over time you’ll learn to know when something is fundamentally wrong with your relationship and that it’s time to move on. But if you begin feeling the itch to move on out of habit, slow down and really think through what’s behind this feeling before making any concrete decisions.
Keep Your Eyes on the Prize
In the end, all you really want is a man who understands you, takes care of you, and who you can trust and have fun with, right? As you enter into a relationship, train yourself to pay close attention to qualities you like about your mate rather than focusing on what could be better. When you find your eye wandering, take a minute to think about what it is you really want in the long run. If the person you’re currently dating possesses those fundamental qualities, he’s worth some more time. And with a little time, it’s possible something really great could blossom from it.
When It’s Right, It’s Right
Many women worry that staying in a relationship with one man will make them completely unavailable to all others. I’m not condoning cheating, but being in a relationship does not stop you from coming into contact with other men. In fact, it may even make you more desirable. And if “The One” happens to not be the one you’re with, nothing will stop it from working out. Just remember that a relationship is not a death sentence, and that committing to a healthy one may allow it to grow into what you’ve been desperately seeking all along.
Ready to get serious about finding the right guy?
Find out exactly why you’re still single — and how you can find love that lasts. Click below to take our scientifically developed D-Factor Dateability Assessment (includes a private coaching session!).