It’s been a whirlwind week for our star, Carolin Bennett! She is completely on track for her 30 lb weight loss after meeting with Health Coach Sharon Otness Foot, and has her eye on her goals. Today, Carolin reflects on the week, specifically her recent couples therapy session with her partner Derek, and tries to find the blessing when life seems like too much to handle. How does she do it?
My ball of string is pretty Big, and pretty tangled it seems. There are days when this process seems pretty streamlined, like my “stuff” isn’t all that complicated, like I’m really making progress- then there are days like today when it seems the spotlight is on full blast- right on the Big, Tangled, snarly ball of string that is my blessing.
Blessing?!, you ask. Well, yes, I say… You see, if it weren’t for this gigantic tangly mess that it is now my Job to unravel I might never have had the opportunity to see how it has served me. You see, a Big Ball of String can come in handy in many a circumstance in this life… There is the time just this morning when I felt like I had to fight for myself so that I could have a kid-free hour to work. But my ball of string unwound just a little as I peeled the boxing gloves from my clenched fists and chose to ask for support in finding time for me rather than compete for what I needed. Did that Ball just get a little lighter? And this evening in therapy when my partner pointed out (non combatively) that I am not very present for our kids- instead of listening I took the role of victim, feeling like “you just try to stay home all day with them and get even ONE thing done for youself while being PRESENT!” Until I took a breath and realized what I needed to do was ask for support and have some plan in place that will allow me to get my work done too. Hmmm- I might’ve just stepped out of being a victim for one minute. The load is getting lighter still.
It is moments like these- only moments, for now- when I set down the Ball and do something different from my usual dance. And in these moments I see that this Big Ball isn’t actually serving me at all- in fact its breaking my back! That motivates me just enough to be compassionate with myself and keep towing the line as I unravel more and more. Maybe I can knit something useful out of it when its unraveled…
Sometimes we look around at the mess we’ve made of our lives, and it seems like we will never be able to get out of it. When you begin to feel like that, it’s important to look for the opportunity – however small it may be. Can you recall a recent time when you felt totally overwhelmed and bogged down with negativity? If you look really hard, what was the opportunity in that situation?