Tonight is the MAN PANEL: How to Increase Your Attraction Factor here at Dating With Dignity and it is an important seminar to make since it plunges the depths of the four main types of MANimals that are not looking for a substantial relationship.
The reality of dating is that almost every straight man is eager to date and enjoy the company of a nice gal, but many are not eager to actually start a substantial relationship. This is reflected in the MANimal species: most notably Mr. Elusive, The Hunter, Mr. Quality Casual, and The Crybaby (see the Dating Den videos for their full breakdowns). The hunter is the most obvious of the species, since his playa-like (no, that is not misspelled) tactics can be most easily spotted since they move like a heat seeking missle. The other boys, though, might not be as obvious. No matter if we men are Hunters, Quality Casuals , or open to the real deal; we all enjoy the company of women and pretty much cannot live without it-even if in the end, we have no intention of actually settling down. So why do I say all of this…to reinforce the idea of DATA DATING.
Even if you end up meeting some great guy who really turns your wheels but through your data dating you discover that he is just a good guy who would rather focus on his career than an actual girlfriend, you have not wasted any time. Quite the opposite: you spent 4-5 weeks taking your time, gaining insight, staying in the moment, learning about values that you dig in a partner, what you don’t dig in a partner, getting out and enjoying life with someone, practicing patience in the bedroom (which is a relationship lesson worth its weight of gold), and discovering that this potential partner would not be good for you in the long haul, even if you think he is dreamy.
I don’t want you to be scared of the MANimal species. Marni will kill me for saying it, but I’d vote for you to date them. Do it. I don’t mean look for them, but don’t walk around with your anti-MANimal spray on when you are out in the dating world. If you practice your DD principles (taking your time, ending the date vertically and clothed, keeping those emotions in balance, staying committed to your values, etc.), trust me, these MANimals will disappear and find gals who fit their agenda. Dating is all about learning about yourself and what works for you. By dating any guy, MANimal or not, you learn a tremendous amount of information about yourself, information that might make you look in the mirror and make you ten times the partner for your future mate.
Good dating changes you as a person, helps you grow and learn, and it should never be about changing the other person so they fit your agenda or become the perfect idea of a partner.
Hopefully, you will make it to the seminar tonight in LA. If you cannot or are in another part of the country, check out the MANimal Dating Den Web Series videos that Marni and I have put on the website. They break down the species pretty well. The overall idea is that we men adore you, and you truly motivate about 90% of the choices we make in life. Some of us, though, are not sure when to focus on just one of you incredible gifts to humanity. As long as you practice those DD principles, it will become very clear as to who is open to finding a committed relationship, and who wants, well…to keep hunting.
By: Christian Anderson